The First Sleepover

Last night, M had one of his little kindergarten friends over for a sleepover.  It was loud, raucous, and a lot of fun.  The highlight of the evening was giving the boys (and tagalong L) a couple of glow sticks and setting them loose out back after dark.  

Authentic, hand-crafted sign designed to keep girls out.

The boys slept in the tent that we have in what should be our formal dining room.  (Wait.  You don't have a tent up in your living room?)  Over the course of the evening and in to the wee hours of the morning, I discovered that kindergarten boys giggle and shriek exactly like little girls.  Go Figure.

Full Contact Basketball? I'm not sure we signed up for this.

I read this post by a friend of mine and it has had me thinking for a few days now.  No, I don't think she's failed as a parent.  Far from it.  Her kids are bright, happy, healthy, absolutely adorable, and I've only seem them be nothing but polite.  But no matter how well we "train" our kids in the art of interacting with other people, there is no way we can control how other parents train their kids.  Do I want to be the mom who goes off on another mom whose child is bullying one of my own?  Not really.  In a perfect world, the other parent would be a parent in the true sense and take care of the offending child's behavior and we could broker a peace deal over coffee and juice boxes.  Alas, playground politics don't usually work out that way.

Right now, M is having some trouble with a brat punk jerk bully on his basketball team.  This bully has managed to include elements of football, ultimate fighting, and Dynasty-esque slapping into the basketball practices and games.  Sure, these kids range in age from 5 to 7, so they are still learning the rules and, for the most part, the coach has done a stellar job of wrangling this bully, but practices and games are crazy (hello...the kids are 5 to 7 years old) and there are times when this little bully gets away with stuff.  Of course, I know about this because I'm on the sidelines at all the practices and games and I see it happen, but I've never gone over to the bully to rectify the situation.   But you know who else is there on the sidelines?  The bully's parents.  They've sat through a number of practices and several games watching their spawn wreak havoc on and off the court and haven't said a word.  I think that juicy tidbit is what angers me the most.  If I saw M running amuck like that, I'd definitely be having stern words with my boy.

In any case, up until a week ago, I didn't want to be the mom who lays into another mom.  However,  everything changed at last week's practice.  Some time during the course of Thursday's practice, this bully called M a, "bitch."  Really.  This word wasn't even on M's radar and now, thanks to this bully, it is.  I took a day to process this and I decided a carefully-worded email to the coach would be my first move.

Hi Coach,

I'm writing this brief email to let you know about something a little unsettling that happened during last night's practice.  It seems as if a little boy on the team (not C-----) called M------ a "b-tch" last night.  Another team member brought it to my attention - apparently she witnessed the name calling.  Even though that particular word isn't really on M------'s radar yet, he does understand that it's a bad word and he's pretty bummed about the whole affair.  We've been working on the whole "words can hurt" lesson at home and now M------ is all full of questions about why one of his teammates would call him a mean name.  M------'s pretty shy and a little overwhelmed on the court, so we are not making a huge deal about this because we are trying to emphasize the fun parts of basketball.  In any case, I understand that your role as a volunteer basketball coach does not include policing everything that comes of out the kids' mouths, but I'm wondering if you'd be able to give the team a little pep talk either this Saturday or next Thursday - whichever best fits your schedule.  Perhaps you could remind them that since they are all on the same team they should work together, not call each other names, and have fun.

Thanks,

Liz Chalmers

(M------'s mom)

I heard back from the coach almost immediately and he was completely on board with my suggestion and in a subsequent email I admitted which particular kid it was and the coach said he'd bring it up one-on-one with the parents.  That should be an interesting conversation.  Hopefully this unfortunate incident will help get this bully under control and the rest of the team can relax a little.  M seems to be enjoying basketball, but I can tell that he's intimidated by this little bully and I don't want him to lose interest in a fun sport just because there's a feral punk on his team.  If I want to think on a grand scale, perhaps this incident will knock the feral punkishness right out of this boy, because if he's this much of a bully when he's in the first grade, I don't want to know him in junior high or high school.

So, even though I don't want to be the mom who goes off on another mom whose child is bullying mine, I will if I need to.  It's my job to keep them safe - physically safe and emotionally safe - and I want them to know that I've got their backs.  

Matthew is number 13.  Go Spurs!

Adventures in Cowtown

Yesterday M was home from school, but L still had nature school, so it ended up being a special M Day.  On days like these, I like to try new things that might otherwise be somewhat difficult when there's an ornery three-year-old in tow.  So, we got up early and headed over to Fort Worth to check out the going's on of the Fort Worth Stock Show and Rodeo.  The Fort Worth Stock Show and Rodeo is the nation's oldest, continuously running livestock show and rodeo.  I believe the first stock show took place in 1896 and in 1918 they hosted the very first indoor rodeo.

Quick Disclaimer:  I grew up over on the "Dallas side" of the Metroplex, so when we moved to Colleyville in 2008, I wasn't too familiar with Fort Worth.  By now, we're quite at home on "this side" of the Metroplex and enjoy going to the Fort Worth Zoo, the Colonial Golf Tournament, and the Fort Worth Museum of Science and History.  Yesterday's trip to the Stock Show was my first and I'm glad I could enjoy it with M.  Here's what we did.

Our first stop was the Watt Arena to watch a few rounds of the Longhorn Cattle Show.  We caught the Texas Longhorn Breeders of Tomorrow - Youth Division, which meant that the people showing the cattle were kids.  One little girl was in third grade, at most.  Seriously, the cow was taller than she was.  I'd like to say that M was impressed by the little girl's achievement, but when you can witness cows going potty making fresh cow pies, then nothing can really compete with that.  One poor boy had trouble with his heifer - she laid down on her side and refused to get up.  The boy, the wranglers, and even the judge worked for a good 20 minutes before they were able to get her out of the judging area.  I'm pretty sure we had that cow for lunch.  After the excitement of cowpies and lazy cows, we moseyed through the barns and took a gander at all the animals.

M would NOT stand next to the Longhorn.  He wasn't afraid of being poked or speared, rather he feared falling into the ginormous cow pie.

Do you think a five-year-old can resist crowing like a rooster when he's surrounded by cages of crowing roosters?

Goats are crazy.

After we sized up the animal barns, we hit the carnival and midway.  The Stock Show was very much NOT crowded, so we were pretty much the only ones in the carnival and midway section - which meant that the carnies and the barkers had only us to do carnie stuff at and bark at.  In spite of that, M had a blast because he never had to wait for a single ride.

What do you call a non-Dumbo elephant ride?  Kind of creepy. 

And there's nothing wrong with the name "The Dragon Wagon," either.  Right? 

Thankfully the petting zoo and pony ride area were a bit more populated.  I discovered that M is generous, if somewhat naive, when it comes to feeding animals in the petting zoo.  We spent nearly 20 minutes and two cones of pellets feeding the four fat goats that hung out by the entrance.  Those goats totally owned him.

I'm fairly certain M alone gave those goats their RDA of livestock pellet and cone.

Knock Knock.  Who's there?  Alpaca.  Alpaca who?  Alpaca the feed if you pack the cones.

M riding "Brownie," while The World's Most Enthusiastic Pony Ride Helper helps.

There's my guy.

Yesterday was immensely fun and we are definitely going back next year with a certain ornery little girl who will love the goats.

Lions, Tigers, and Ligers, Oh My!

Yesterday we visited Tiger World in Rockwell, NC.  In addition to seeing a variety of tigers, a slew of lions, and even some Syrian Brown Bears, we had a chance to see two ligers!  I doubt it needs any explaining, but a liger is a cross between a male lion and a tigress and, you know, it's bred for its skills in magic.  The liger, Lil' Wayne, was pretty much Lauren's favorite animal there.  She even paced with it for a while.

Lil' Wayne was totally sizing us up. 

Two tasty morsels looking like delicacies in front of Lil' Wayne. 

Lauren, the Liger Whisperer.

The pacing lasted several minutes.  Other zoo visitors captured it on film too.

A heartfelt farewell.

Thanks for the fun, Tiger World!

The Animal Kingdom, Unleashed - North Carolina Style

During our stay in North Carolina, we visited the Lazy 5 Ranch in Mooresville with Mimi, Grandad, and Aunt J.  You'd have thought we'd have learned our lesson from our trip to Glen Rose.  We did to some extent.  For example, we opted NOT to ride around the animal area in a personal vehicle, so thankfully there was no need to worry about feral ostriches pecking their way into the car.  Lazy 5 was a new experience, however, since we travelled through the animal's territory en plein air in a horse-drawn wagon.  So as it turned out, we didn't have to worry about feral ostriches pecking the car so much as we had to worry about feral emus pecking our skulls.

Mmmmmmm.  Fresh Meat.

We loaded into the wagon, received instructions from the driver, and laid claim to our feed buckets.  There was actually a bit of strategy to feeding the animals.  Most animals we could feed from our hands. The emus, ostriches, and giraffes ate directly from the buckets.  We had to drop handfuls of food into the waiting mouths of the yaks and buffalos.  Sadly, we were not allowed to feed the zebra, the ankole-watusi, and the brahman (zebu cattle). 

Feed buckets.

I think this is a Nilgai trying to make friends with Matthew.

Look!  Steve is touching a wild animal!  I think it's an Eland or maybe a Scimitar Horned Oryx.

Here Lauren is demonstrating how to feed a buffalo (bison?).  Basically the beasts just circled the wagon with their mouths hanging open, waiting for you to lob some pellets in.  My life would be so much easier if I could take Steve and the kids outside, get up on a platform, and throw food down into their open mouths.

Excellent buffalo (bison?) feeders.

The animals even ate the fallen pellets.  Lauren took this opportunity to give a llama some love.

After hitting the petting zoo, we took a moment to take a family picture.  This is the first picture since April where the four of us are together!

The Animal Kingdom, Unleashed

This weekend we made the short trip to Glen Rose, Texas to visit the not-for-profit wildlife center there.  In addition to operating captive breeding programs for endangered and threatened animals, they also have upwards of 1000 animals representing 60 species that roam freely on 1500 acres.  That's right, we packed up the car and headed out on a Safari.  I really can't complain too much, since we kind of set ourselves up for some pulse-pounding, adrenaline-pumping action, but I never imagined that our particular vehicle would create such a frenzy.

It began with the ostriches.

Majestic birds.  I guess.

Just don't make fun of them when they're within earshot.

Oh man.  He spotted us!

Don't anybody move.
I'm pretty sure they can smell fear.

It's trying to peck its way into the car.
Wait!  Where did the other one go?!

Uh, oh.  We're surrounded.
At least M is happily oblivious to the peril.

We escaped the coven of ostriches but then became waylaid by a pack of roving antelope-type animals.  The females were sweet enough and Lauren had a fun time feeding them.

I, on the other hand, was accosted by a rogue male antelope-type animal, who felt right at home sticking its malodorous snout into my side of the car in a brazen attempt to snatch food pellets.  That's right.  MY SIDE OF THE CAR!  MY WINDOW WAS DOWN!  I HAD DEER (or whatever) IN MY LAP.  Thankfully my valiant knight-in-shining armor came to my rescue.  Steve crafted an ingenious ruse to draw this beast's attention away from me.  So he kicked it into high gear and launched his plan to throw food pellets behind the behemoth, thereby compelling said behemoth to back the heck up.  Alas, my valiant knight's plan had one fatal flaw.  Rather than leaning out his side of the car and hurtling the pellets over the top of the vehicle, he decided to half-heartedly toss them THROUGH the car whereupon they hit the ceiling and ricocheted INTO MY HAIR AND LAP.  I was drenched in food pellet and food pellet powder.  The moose (?) lunged.  I screamed my patented murder scream.  The moose fled, ears ringing.

I snapped this one right before all the melee. 

Check out those antlers!

After our run-in with the pack of ostriches and my near-death experience with the antlered animal, we played it safe with the zebra and kept our windows up.  Even though the windows were merely cracked so we could throw out some food, the zebra still tried to eat Steve.

After seeing her mom nearly dragged from the car by an antelope-like animal, L had lost much of her earlier bravado.

The giraffes were awesome.  Sure, one of them stooped down to jam its head through my carelessly-rolled-down window, but for whatever reason, the giraffes just weren't as life threatening as the other animals.

Our drive through the wildlife center taught us many important life lessons about the value of family and the importance of expressing love for one another.  

But mostly we were thankful that we weren't riding in a soft-sided vehicle, because I'm pretty sure the ostrich would have been able to peck through that.  And really, did you see those antlers??